Conan O'Brien's favorite band is Led Zeppelin and he collects guitars. My favorite band is Led Zeppelin and I like guitars. So why don't I like Conan O'Brien?
I've never been sold on Conan O'Brien. When Jay Leno took the helm of the Tonight Show, David Letterman left NBC for CBS, and an unknown named Conan (the Barbarian?) was announced as Letterman's heir, I was so excited I didn't know what to do. Jay and Dave were my heroes and I couldn't wait to see them take the captain's chairs at 11:30, but who was this Conan O'Brien guy and what did he do to deserve to inherit Dave's kingdom? Was he a new favorite on the horizon?
NBC and Lorne Michaels, the producer of all the weakest seasons of Saturday Night Live and the guy who got O'Brien the job, went on a campaign to convince the world this unknown writer with a comic book character's name was legit. Their proof was a single 20-second slice of screen test video where some actor said working on his latest film was "hard work," and O'Brien responded, "Hard work is something like turning a big crank, not making a movie." I thought that was pretty funny, but where was the rest? The big crank comment got played as often as Sarah Palin's pitbull-in-lipstick line. One joke does not a career make. You could put a camera on anybody for 10 hours and a mild funny could slip out.
So I gave Conan O'Brien a chance. Dreadful. Clearly Andy Richter was a crutch to cover up for how not-funny Conan was. I would watch a show hosted by Andy Richter religiously. Conan? No thanks.
Conan's shtick is to come out and prance around like he's pulling strings on his pants and cutting off his tie with his fingers, then he does a dance that looks like he's attempting the mid-70's Robot. You know, kinda like the annoying, not-funny dickheads you know in real life do. Then he steps on his interviewees with lots of awkward witticisms that depend on him making silly faces and weird noises because he has few crafty observations to share. The fewer laughs it gets, the longer he'll stare at the camera and repeat whatever shenanigan he's doing until the audience laughs uncomfortably to move him along. You know, kinda like the annoying, not-funny dickheads you know in real life do.
Now Conan has the most coveted job in all of show business, host of The Tonight Show. Maybe someone will finally have taken him in hand, after 16 years on NBC, and groomed him into a worthy successor to Johnny Carson? Not from the couple of times I've tuned in. He does lob in the occasional witty rejoinder, but as I said in paragraph two, anybody is bound to luck up now and then.
However I was worried I was alone in my perception. All over the Internet I read people below 38 saying Conan is great and if he's too corny, you're too old. Well, these whippersnappers need to put their TV's where there mouths are, because all reports say
Conan is hemorrhaging viewers of all ages! His ratings dip lower with every show, with every robot dance, with every silly face.
Here's why Conan isn't funny: He grew up wealthy, went to Harvard, became the chief editor of the National Lampoon, the Harvard campus comedy magazine, and then cakewalked into a job as a writer on The Simpsons (he boasts of being the guy behind the monorail episode, one of the lamest episodes ever), then on to SNL where he met Michaels who got him the Late Night job he didn't deserve. There was no hard, uphill struggle; no angst-building experiences to fuel the passive-aggressive tendencies that are the building blocks of great comedians.
Andy Richter is funny because he's overweight and went to a state college. Conan is not funny because he's skinny and went to Harvard. Andy will not get his own talk show because he is overweight and went to a state college. Conan has a show because he's skinny and went to Harvard.
I'm loath to beat up on a fellow Led Zeppelin fan, but...Conan sucks. So do Jimmy Fallon and that Scottish guy that follows Dave. Jimmy Kimmel is lukewarm, but these days lukewarm is the new smokin' hot. I guess somebody invented streaming Internet porn just in time to fill my after hours.
Conan O'Brien Slips in Ratings
Conan O'Brien's Ratings Drop - Considerably!
David Letterman Beats Conan O'Brien's Ratings
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Cheers & Good Luck, 'VJ'
Doesn't all this make you miss Tom? That is my career goal - to be a hip rock n roll Tom Snyder.
When I found the pic for this post I was thrilled, because it perfectly captures why I just don't think Conan is Tonight Show material. Johnny never ran to the camera and made a "funny face" like that in 30 years. He didn't have to, he had it with words.
I agree with your analysis, two months into the new Tonight Show. I had hope that Conan might be hip enough to draw a younger crowd while growing up enough to appease us old-timers. But I see now that he's having trouble drawing flies.
When he took over Late Night years ago, I just knew any day a NBC exec would realize the real talent on that show was Andy Richter. Conan would thrash around like a hooked fish trying to get a laugh, and Andy would throw in a wry comment and blow the audience up without even shifting in his chair. Conan seemed like he should've been Andy's straight man. Then Andy disappeared for an acting career that didn't come together, and now, like a dog, he's not allowed on the couch but stands behind a podium (?).
Andy was also a guest of Jay Leno's once, and I've never seen anybody top Jay with a comeback, but Andy slayed him! Come on, NBC research team! Let's put Andy Richter at the top of the marquee!
I'm glad I'm not the only one who's noticed that despite being 6'5" or so, Conan O'Brien isn't big enough to fill Carson's shoes.
So who could have gone into the slots? I think a Matthew Perry or the like could have done a decent 12:30pm run for the money. I thought Sarah Silverman might do OK with a Friday night 1am slot.
There just aren't any Johnny Carson / Jack Parr types out there. Subtlety is what is required, along with some intelligence, bordering on edgy. Stupid is rarely funny.
What's the answer? I Tivo both shows, fast forward through the crap, and watch the interviews and comic / musical acts. I watch both shows in an hour tops.
You think Conan and Jimmy are sucking air? Wait until Jay dominates the M-F 10pm slot. Just my opinion, but can you do 5 hours of programming based on bringing on stupid people failing junior high school questions?